Kincaid Chronicle


(Season 14 Game 13)

Hello to all you waxheads and findicks, Partridgers, supporters, Brainiacs, and tryhards. This is the Tuesday, March 22, 2006 match report, via YCFTN, THE ONE, THE ONLY MARY, the questionnaire extraordinaire. That's right, It's once again time for the fabled Kincaid Chronicles.

Assembly for the troops was set for 0530 hours, and so the troops assembled in dribs and drabs ranging from 0515 to 0540, but fortunately for those arriving slightly late, the other team had only four players. So, in accordance with rule 20388540.3 of the House of Bloodyfarkin' Indoor Crigget Manual, Da Famulee was sent into field.

So YCFTN, complete with Thunderbirds Hat, threw the ball to Sticksy with a cheeky smirk, which could only mean one thing, Sticksy would be bowling the 1st and 16th overs. OR WOULD HE???


So the first four over's read Sticks, -10, with some fantastic dipping and fizzing fruit, Herchelle, 11, with four wide's to start the spell CHA-CHING, Knuckles, 10, with the back net or wicket technique and Finally Mary, 8 bowling with the spirit of WA WA with him. The net result was 19 to the bad guys.

Over's 5 through 8 now and it was action a plenty. Skip started off with great line and length for -1, then Forrest with his mixed bag of goodies for -4, Kleenex with the pace of a young Brett Lee went for 5, and Bevo finished up with a great over, hopping and skipping his way to an over of 4. A pair of 4 and after 8 over's they were just 23.

The next pair was started by a rampant Herchelle, who turned around his form to purchase an over of -11, Mary bowling without luck for the loss of 2 runs, Bevo trying the Knuckles approach going for 11, and being finished off by the aforementioned Knuckles who went for just 2. Another stoop-endous pair going for just 4 runs, and leaving the bad guys with a poor 27 runs.

Before the start of the final pair, the cries of SURELY were being chucked around more than Murali on a seedy Kandy wicket, and a comment was passed that SURELY Mary could notch up his maiden win as captain.

Well, the proverbial hit the fan and the curse continues. Forrest bowled well, but got carted for 12, then Kleenex and Skip both bowled over's of considerable girth, being dispatched to all parts. Kleenex with 16 and Skip with 18 runs off them. And so the cheeky grin came through as YCFTN tossed the ball the Sticks, who quickly saw it being bowled and subsequently sent back over his head, going for a fantabulous 18 runs. And so the last pair scored 64 and the end result was Partridge needing 91 off 128 balls, approximately.

And so with 19 off 32 runs, Herchelle and Skip, otherwise known as the WUUUUUUNNNNNNNN cricket WONDERS, were sent in first. And they didn't disappoint, going up and down more times than a yoyo. This despite some atrocious umpiring to which we would discover Herchelle did not approve of. They made it to 10 and required 10 of 8 deliveries to win the skin. An early 7 runs suggested they would make it, until the score moon walked back to eventually rest at 10. Herchelle 6 Skip 4. SKIN 10 (chasing 19)

The second set, and Kleenex and Bevo were sent in with the task of scoring 3, chasing 4. And they went on to exceed all expectations. Sticksy prediction of the pair scoring -17 was quickly looking as it would be realized as after 2 over's they moon walked back to -13. But the quickly fought back and off the last ball they were on 9, five ahead of the skin. Last ball, its two dots, score must change. Ball is bowled, Bevo missed it, and Kleenex devised an ingenious plan to not run and lose a wicket, thus tying the skin. Kleenex 7 Bevo -3. SKIN 4 (tied skin) Team Total: 14 & Struggling

Knuckles, after much bitching and moaning, to which his sexuality was questioned, YCFTN put Knuckles and Forrest in to chase the 3rd skin of 4, which was a jackpot double bonanza skin as to rule 299385.5 paragraph 6 of the House of Bloodyfarkin' Indoor Crigget Manual. They started of with a BAAAAAAAAANNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG (insert Bill Lawry voice) and flew to the double jackpot bonanza skin with over's of 10, 7, 15 & 14. This included Knuckles with 5 impressive Zaks. Knuckles 27 Forrest 19 SKIN 46 (chasing 4) Team Total: 60

The final pairing of YCFTN and Sticks were set the arduous task of chasing 32 off 32 to win. As the two strode out, the crowd hooting and booing wildly, the decision of who was to face the first ball was decided with Sticks choosing scissors and Mary choosing rock. Sticks to face the first delivery. Over's of 17, 14 & 16 saw the score soared to 107 and it was SURELY to be Mary's first win as captain. And it was with the last over gaining 3 more runs, disappointingly missing the skin but winning the game. Sticks 43 Mary 7. SKIN 50 (chasing 64) Team Total 110.

And so it was to be, Da Famulee wins by 19 runs and the crowd expectantly will wait for the triumphant Partridge to stride out next week.


Sticks 3 (net worth 30)
Knuckles 2 (net worth 15)
Forrest 1 (net worth 6)


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