Kincaid Chronicle

A Huge Arse wooping to be had.

(Season 9 Game 7)

Da Famulee gathered at Blardyfarkens venue, this time under the captaincy of Herschelle the 125 game veteran. After last weeks ribbing of Tony upon finding out the Hugh Jass were still in our grade and that da famulee would have to play them this week da famulee were not of very high hopes at the outcome of the impending game.

Herschelle won the toss and elected to Bat favouring the south westerly wind blowing outside would enhance Hercs football skills. He sent in Boof and Bukkake but for some reason Bukkake turned into Gareth. Not to worry, the boys set of at a blistering pace scoring 24 off the first over. There were a couple of muted calls of "it's all down hill from here" and surely it was, -9 from the second over followed by -15 from the third saw heads dropping. As Mark "Bevo skippy" Bevan came up to bowl da famulees eye lit up to see what carnage they could muster against our one of many nemisesesess. A runout off the first ball was not the start we were looking for. A zak and couple of runs saw the over finish with 7. Off came the lads with a, hmmmm finding describing word (cause i can't remember the correct term), anyways 7 for the partnership. To top it off, no fines! Boof with 2 and Gareth 5.

The familiar pairing of the leading game players Herc and Schlang, or is that Schlang and Herc, you two can sort it out. They started off shakily with a -3 opening over, then poise and grace set in. NOt sure where it set it but it somewhere I am sure. They wittled away at the bowling scoring at the side nets freely and zaks when they were there to be hit. Schlang with one and and Herc with 2. The lads finished a brilliant display with the bat with a partnership of 46.

Next up were the captain and yet another Famulee ring-in Bryan "I shall welease Bwyan" Henshaw were up next. Hersch jinxing the batting pair before entering the arena turning to Bwyan saying "if we come out with 20 I will be happy", given his recent, ok very very long shit house, performance over the past couple of season was not a good thing to say. During the course getting run out on a couple of occasions and using too much side and not enough top net was caught out. Bwyan played like a seasoned cricketer, the like da famulee rarely sees actually playing for our club, scoring the side nets freely. They finished with a respectable 25 by seeing off the ever fast Jez "i can hit a six on any ground" Eagle with loosing a wicket. Phew. Bwyan scoring 18 of these partnership runs.

78 seemed like a reasonable score but "surely we couldn't...." yes the faith we place in our team mates is truly astounding. Bukkake and Kleenex were set the task of reaching triple figures and started well Pablo belting a Zak the first ball he faced only to caught and runout later in the same over. Marc "Dickhead" Perraeu" gave the lads little trouble being unable to snare a wicket. With the score creeping up to 96 on came Jezza to fire down a few rockets, he bothered the boys a tad taking 2 for -1 off the over and the magic 100 slipped that little further away. Bukkake, not be outdone by Kleenex, cracked a whooping Zaks of Gazzas bowling taking da famulee to 106. "Surely we couldn't..." could be heard on the sidelines. Dot, One, Three saw the score creep up 110. "Surely..." again, Pablo dancing down the wicket was stumped and the score retreated to 105. With hearts in mouths, mmmm m m mm mmm m m m m m m m , taking the hearts out of our mouths so could cheer, Kleenex faced off the final ball of the innings with a dot. Da Famulee with a final score of a respectable, but not very defendable total given recent efforts, 105.

On to the slaughter in the field.

Expecting Jez and Gaz to open the account with a 60+ partnership Herschelle decided to put bring on Gareth but when two gumby looking blokes came on Gareth was sent packing and Kleenex opened the account taking 3 for -10. Defending the skin of 7 was looking good so far. Fiz and dip Schlang brought more devastation to Hugh Jass taking 2 for -3, sending the opposition score further backwards. Bwyan continued the good form taking 3 for -12 sending the score crashing to -25, after Hersch stopped a certain zak by knocking the ball up in the air and with the desperation of a man possessed to avoid a fine had to dive full length to complete the catch. Certainly a Schwepps classic catch if only the cameras were on him. Hersch then came on and magically the wickets dried up but was able to keep the batting pair to 10. Da famulee wins the first skin 7 to -15. If nothing else we have 2 points for the night.

Next on came Jez and Gaz to run down the Schlang/Herc partnership of 46. Given their previous form of partnerships in excess of 60, this would be a formality. Herc bowled without luck as the wicket dry spell continued but kept them to 16 runs. Bukkake and Gareth took a couple of wickets but the score continued to climb reaching 34. Da famulee still had a faint sniff of defending a second skin. Boof came on taking 2 wickets with the first to balls narrowly missing out on a hat-trick but a great effort by Herc to make up the ground. Hersch ran out Jez and also caught an absolute rocket from Jez taking it like a baseball catcher, except that if he had had a mitt it wouldn't have hurt as much. Boof finishing the over with 4 for -9. Da famulee had won its second skin and kept the danger pair to a very respectable 25. A disappointed Jez and Gaz disappeared and were not see again for the rest of the evening.

The third batting pair of Ron and Cam posed no real danger to da famulee as it continued it unusual good form garnering a runout in every over and a couple of juggle catches by Kleenex and Bwyan to boot. Schlangmiester was the pick of the bowlers taking 3 for -6. Da Famulee had its third skin by conserving the partnership to 1.

Hugh Jass were to say the least in Huge Arse trouble with a team total of 11 after 3 batting pairs. Oddly enough the taunts and niggling from the side lines dried up as da famulee juggernaut continued the slaughter. Herc tying Bevo down the batters end for the entire over taking 2 for -4. Gareth and Bukkake unlucky to take any more wickets from the batting pair, who ended up with 30 and preventing da famulee from a clean sweep of the points.

An absolutely fantastic effort by da famulee, everyone contributed to the game, enjoyed themselves and generally had a good time. The form of which we have not seen for at least two very long seasons. Truly a pleasure to watch.

Thank you to Bwyan for filling in and adding to the ever growing ranks of da famulee support list

Other Fielding Highlights:
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Boof and Bukkake did great work behind the stumps

Pablo 1 catch
Schlang 2 catches, 1 cha-ching
Herc 1 catch, 1 cha-ching
Bwyan 3 catches, 1 cha-ching
Gareth 1 catch, 1 cha-ching
Hersch 4 catches, 4 run outs

Hersch fielding like a demon on the back net, jumping and diving around like an ape on speed.

plus many others too numerous to remember, memory overflow

Milestones Acheived:
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Hersch 125 Career Games Played
Bukkake 25 Career Zaks

Tooth:
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3 Bwyan 25
2 Schlang 22
1 Herc 21


And on to next week, where hopefully the Big Al will make his Season 9 debut. Blardyfarken has been hounded continuously for some 8.10 games but has yet to provide such a thing.

toodle pip

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