Kincaid Chronicle

Wednesday 6th June 2001

(Season 5 Game 9)

Highlights Reel:
Well the night started with the plomp and splender of some big do. Told Wazza they were fielding and he could stick his toss where the sun don't shine. Out onto the field they strode, stumbled and sauntered led by the magestic Schlang back from studying the text in Playboy.

In the usual Famulee form, took the first four overs to get the alcohol soaked blood pumping and let the Hamsters, what sort of shit name is that?, get away to a flying start of 59 with every bowler hit for a Zak. The second batting pair entered the field, the famulee blood now suitably alcoholated and kept this second pair to a very respectable 13. Reuben is now paying attention to the game as the 3rd batting pair enter the arena of belittling and sarcasm.

What a joyous second over from the long studying Schlang:

Ball 1 "One"
Ball 2 "One" (as only Wazza can)
Ball 3 Stumping
Ball 4 "Legside"
Ball 5 "Legside"
Ball 6 "Legside" Crowd: "Cha-Ching"
Schlang: "Stuff this I'm changing sides"
Ball 7 "Legside" Schlang: "Screw you hippies I'm changing back"
Ball 8 "Legside"

Keeping the batsman anchored to the ground and the batting pair to just 8 runs.

On comes Wawa, hurt by his first over and fire in his eyes, hurled the grenades down the field at the frightened Hamsters. Come the 7th ball he has had enough and puts one nicely in the slot, for the batter that is, who promptly smacks it straight down the field. From left field comes Boof diving back and to the right in a vain attempt to catch the bullet. Wawa still in his grenade delivery position sticks his hands up, to prevent being falconed, pops the ball up, Boof falls to the floor, balls is miracolously caught on the second attempt by the very joyous Wawa. "Have to catch my own balls do i?" Yes you do son, cause I ain't going to touch them.

Hercs second over had the ups and downs of One.Tel on the stockmarket. Zak off the first ball did not please him at all. Second ball, powerzone shot by batsman, ball disappears in between No Looks legs for a catch, feeling better Herc puts one in the slot, ZZZZAAAAKKK to the back goes the third ball.

Bring on the diving Boof for his second. None too please at his first over and failed diving catch attempt took the batters apart Wawa taking the brunt of a ball, destined for the four on any ground, in his side popping the ball into the air, off the side net and into the running hand of Knuckles. Putting the body on the line for the famulee, "I like it" Minus 7 off the over and Boof still in the hunt for the nights Houndstooth points. 3rd batting pair finishing with 17. Knuckles attempted to perform open heart surgery on Mojo by sending a blistering throw straight into his chest. "I could have probably taken a little off that" as Mojo convulsed on the floor with a cracked sternum. The NRMA medi-golfcart couldn't get onto the field so Mojo had to get up off the floor and play on.

4th batting decided they were going for a slog, slog they tried. During the 13th over Boof tried again to catch the ball, this time taking a leaf from Wawas book, decided not to catch it on the first attempt but rather the second as this worked for Wawa. And work it did for Boof. Knuckles "Best on ground" Bowman stepped up to the plate and was making short work of the pesky Hamsters, Dot, Dot, Runout, Bowled, Caught, dropped Dolly by Boof destroyed Knuckles chances of a hat-trick the over now blemished, Dot and "One" for a score of minus 11. Onto the 16th over and Mojo has placed Herc into the slips who snares a catch rebounding off No Look and 2 nets on the first ball of the over.

Hamsters finished with a very gettable, if you are not the Partridge Famulee, target of just 102.

The batting, well, the luck was not with us last night, Reuben was getting tired due to his old age and the lateness of the game being past the curfew for the elderly citizens of society place of residence. Brief highlights of the batting were, No Look being run out for backing up too far. "Beeeep Beeeep Beeeep". No Look for being run out twice whilst loping down the pitch without a care in the world. Though the steam coming out of his ears at the end of his batting stint seemed a little out of place. Mojo working the top net spoon and subsequently caught. Best runout of the night has to go to the Captain of the night Schland for his call of "Noo!" to Herc and then still running down the pitch to get himself promptly runout. As mentioned earlier the luck was not with the Famulee last night. The team played well but if the ball doesn't bounce for you on the day you ain't got no hope of winning.

Brilliant comeback in the fielding by all after the first partnership carved the Famulee of 59 but unfortunately couldn't take the run into the batting.

Net Worths and Tooth Points:

Schlang -31
Knuckles +15 3 (This is including the -5 for the shirt so should be +20)
Herc - 7 1
Mojo -10
WaWa -20
No Look + 3 2
Forrest -13
Boof -13

Fines Aplenty: $11.00

Schlang Dolly
5 legsides in an over
Negative batting score
Boof Dolly
Negative batting score
No Look Fine for false accusation against Schlang
WaWa Fine for false accusation against Schlang
Mojo Dolly
Forrest Negative batting score

With 4 fines still to come by those who did not supply their shirts for Friday or Tueday.

Shirt Situation:

Friday Tuesday Currently

No Look (c) No Look No Look
Forrest Forrest Forrest
WaWa WaWa WaWa
Big Al ? ?
Boof Boof Boof
Richard ? ?
Herc Herc
Schlang (c)
Mojo Mojo

Big Al and Richard had shirts on Friday. To whom did these go to or have we found our finees?

Oscar went without a shirt on Fridays game. So 2 people still owe fines.

Pablo gave his shirt to Schlang last night.
Knukles went without a shirt last night. So again 2 people owe a fines.
Schlang gave his shirt to Herschelle.


Next weeks game is 5.30 on Tuesday.


Maybe Availables

Not Available

Please let me know your availability for next Tuesday as a couple of the availables may be on suspension next week due to 3 consequtive net worths.

This is Reuben Kincaid reporting delayed from the Weston Indoor Crigget Centre.

Reuben Kincaid
Partridge Famulee

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