Kincaid Chronicle

7 is a lucky number

(Season 23 Game 22)

Some may say the number 7 is a lucky number, but when it comes to the purple and lime green, the number 7 would mean going for our 7th win in a row.

Hi sport fans and welcome to the Chronicle for game 22 of season 23. Forrest here, also known as the 'Big C’ and not wanting to put too much pressure on us as we head into the possibility of chalking up our 7th consecutive win, surely with our form, we’re in with a big chance.

So, on a mild Toozdae evening in downtown Weston Creek on the 15th of March 2011, Reuben had advised of the following Partridges earlier in the day against the Thrill Killers as:

Forrest (Big C)
Sticks (shirts)
Herschelle
Schlang
Skip
Klenex
Pretty Eyes
Herc – (Emergency)
Bukkake – (Double Super Secret Emergency)

As it turned out, Cali and Gilligan who were listed as TBA (To Be Advised) but were more likely to being engaged in another kind of TBA – Tea Bag Action! As for Mary and Jacko, we were dutifully advised by Reuben as being engaged in some kind of feminine leisure activity and it’s probably best that we just don’t go there...

Anyway, Bukkake’s secret emergency must have been some kind of secret ‘cos we never saw him that night, and for that matter, Pretty Eyes would also be a no-show, so Herc stepped up from emergency to team player. As we get set for the WACA, I call “We’ll bat first” and through some kind of agreed negotiation, we do bat first!

The batting order would be the line-up announced by Reuben, which as the Big C, I could’ve afforded myself an opportunity to not bat in the first skin (as seems to be the usual practice), so with Sticks, we head out to take on the Thrill Killers. With the thought of 6 wins in a row coming into this game, no pressure. Well, not much, as a little research shows that when Da Famulee has played them on the two previous occasions (November 2010 and December 2010), they were close games whereby we had been defeated. Surely with our winning streak in tact we couldn’t go backwards from here, even with 7 players.

Between Sticka and Forrest (the Big C), we managed a respectable platform, with Sticks managing a lovely ladled zak into the back net, the only zak as it turned out, that would be hit for the night from the purple and lime green. Even YCFTN (Your Captain For The Night) who’s been in career best zak form this season would fail to trouble the scoresheet that never lies on this front. Plenty of 2’s and a couple of 5’s from the pair pushed the score to 41 runs after 4 overs.

Next in were Herschelle and Schlang, and despite going backwards quickly early in their partnership, the lads clawed their way back, thanks largely to their bowlers failing to keep the yellow dot anywhere near the wickets, which if anything, permitted the gathered audience to shout “Swaaaaaaaaaaay’ on many occasions. Schlang managed to get the ball into the back half a couple of times, while Hersch, with a sore back, battled on with the willow pushing 1s and 2s when not arching his back in true textbook swayage form. After their allotted 4 overs, they had done nicely and managed a partnership of 40 runs, one run shy of Sticka and YCFTN’s platform, but still a good total was building and the confidence of a 7th win was beginning to gather momentum.

Kleenex and Skip would come in next and with 14 runs coming from their first over, Da Famulee was pushing for a total of three figures and looking like it was going to stay there. Again, Pabs and Skipper swayed like they’d never swayed before, picking up an easy 2 runs with abandon every time. But of course, just when you think you’re going well, enter the stitch-up, a common and regular feature of any game when the Partridge Famulee are playing. Kleenex called “Yes”, then kinda stopped running, Skip was half jogging half backing-up, confusion reigned supreme, Skipper really should’ve held his ground at the non-strikers end, but by then, Kleenex’s blistering pace had forced Skip’s hand (and bat) and there were 5 runs coming off the score. Despite this hiccup, amongst the usual Pabs dabbage (where a competition was briefly held to see whether Pabs could hit the ball into the back half of the court at any stage of his partnership), they had a platform of 35 runs and after 12 overs, we were in triple figures with a score of 116 runs.

Herc, who had come in as emergency, would bat with Skip (who was chosen again – perhaps it was based upon the stitch-up?) and after the jackpot ball which Herca faced, he (as we all thought too at the time), getting out first ball with a minus 10 against your name (on the scoresheet that never lies) is not the start you’re after. Still, we’ve all come back from situations like this, well, that’s what we wished, but as our total score went from three figures back to two, it wasn’t the night for finishing strongly. As it turned out during overs 13 to 16, Skip would bat bravely in his second stint while Herc would also bat bravely but not have it reflected on the scoresheet (that never lies). In fact, if memory recalls, Herc was heard as saying “I hate this game” or something similar and we all started to guess his negative. But why guess when you can simply ask the umpire at the halftime changeover, which is what we did, but not before seeing the scoreboard go backwards. Skip managed a ‘positive’ with the bat, not that it was going to help, as it would be a negative partnership, a couple of cha-chings for the kitty and Herc would be ‘negative’ plenty.

So, after all the excitement that is Weston Creek and the House of Blooooodyfaaaarkin, we have a grand total of 82 runs.

As the ‘Big C’, I could’ve applied the bowling order in the same way I determined the batting, but then I thought, “Nah, let’s just mix it up” and with that, Herc would open up, with me thinking that he could redeem himself with the ball as it wasn’t working for him with the bat. (Oh, by the way, it was minus 39 for Herc with the bat) While Herc didn't pick up a wicket, he kept their batters at bay, as did Skip with over 2. Over 3 from Schlangy produced the first wicket of the night (and Schlangy’s been picking up heaps of wickets this season with his ‘fruit’ and wacky barracking for the Cats), and with Pabs also picking up a wicket in over 4, we contain the Thrill Killers first pair and secure a skin. Hey, a 7th win may still be within reach!

With Sticks keeping watch on the back net for the first four overs, over five would be his, and sadly, he bowled without luck, as did YCFTN with over 6. Hersch came into the attack with over 7, and while he bowled under some duress, it did work as he collected a wicket. Over 8 would be from Skip, and with YCFTN wishing for a repeat over from the big marn, we went close to taking the second skin. If only YCFTN had managed to throw down the stumps and effect a run-out. Wasn’t to be a second skin but after 8 overs and at the halfway mark, comparatively, we were still in front. We had 81 runs, they had 69 runs.

Taking on their third pair would be Pabs, followed by Herc, then Sticka and YCFTN. It wasn’t a good four overs for Da Famulee. Kleenex went for 21 runs, then Herc went for 21 runs, Sticka went for 18 runs and while YCFTN didn’t quite get smacked about like Pabs, Herc and Sticksy had, he did get smacked in the cha-ching department. Gotta love dropping catches off your own bowling, one of which could’ve been a parry into the back net had it not been saved (and caught) by Jimmy Neutron. Sadly, the punishment pushed the Thrill Killers into a lead which would be hard to rein in. They were 134 runs after 12 overs and still a batting pair to come, not to mention they had to choose two bowlers.

Schlang and Herschelle, who had only bowled one over each to this point, would lead us off. Schlang had the jackpot ball and they managed no score from it. “Two dots” was the cry and next delivery, they spoon up a catch. Was the scoreboard flashing, or broken, as we like to say? Yes, it was, but only momentarily, as Schlangy was zakked. Hersch too would have the number 7 for a zak, next to his name on the scoresheet that never lies, and the number 7 was becoming a bit too familiar for all the wrong reasons. With Pabs and Herc selected to bowl again, no more wickets would fall in overs 15 and 16, all it would be was more pain at the thought of no seventh consecutive victory.

Final scores were Thrill Killers 198 to our Partridge 82.

As it would finally show, it wasn’t the best night for Herc, but then again, we’ve all had nights like his. Net worth for Herc would be negative 96, with Schlangy posing the question, “Is that a record?” Not that Schlangy was too concerned, he was too busy smiling over the fact that his 26 runs with the bat was one better that YCFTN who managed 25 runs with the bat. As it turned out, Schlangy would also end up with a positive net worth and three tooth points from the game. Skip was also in the tooth points from the night.

When it came to the Captain’s Fine, well, you were fined a goldie if you played in the game whereby you were playing for a 7th straight win but didn’t get it. In other words, everyone was fined, which seemed the proper thing to do as around $25 goldies were contributed to the kitty at games end.

FORREST
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