Kincaid Chronicle

Season 15 - Game 29

(Season 15 Game 29)

Chickeny-Duck Things, welcome to your match report for Game 29 of Season 15 as we wind down to the end of what has been a long season, one full of mediocrity, close margins, plenty of cha-chings, sledges and stitch-ups!

Oh, and did I mention a season whereby being named 100th reserve still guarantees you a run on the paddock?

Such was the case on Tuesday the 20th of March. Despite a list of a dozen or so available players on the books, the Partridge Famulee front up at the graveyard time of 9:30pm with only 5 players. Forrest, who becomes your self-selected Captain For The Night (YCFTN), Herschelle, Kleenex, Bukkake & Sticks are ready to battle with “Return of the Stiffy’s” who have a full compliment of fresh-faced pimpled warriors.*

*Team may not actually resemble warriors.

Having the lesser numbers, we duly informed by the Umpire that we’re to bat.

YCFTN and Herschelle are first up to face 4 overs of a swinging ball. Plenty of swaaaays, gentle dabbage and side net sees the pair return with a skin of 42 runs. What a difference it makes when neither player gets out!

Next pair of Bukakke and Kleenex were not so fortunate. Their 1st over saw 4 run-outs with the cry of “Scoreboard’s broken” from what little support we had, but to their credit, the guys came back nicely. Bukakke managed a zak with lofty bat swinging and Kleenex pushed a few soft singles to climb to a total partnership of 12 runs after 4 overs.

At the halfway mark, Da Famulee have amassed 54 runs.

Sticks then takes to the pitch with Herschelle (who’s back for a 2nd run) and a nice piece of correct bottom hand action sees Sticka record a zak against his name. At least this zak counted on the scoresheet unlike the previous week! Herschelle’s good form from his 1st innings wasn’t quite repeated a second time around in that he bowled a couple of times, but with Sticks securing a 2nd zak, the pair manage a total of 25 runs for their partnership.

After 12 overs, we’re at 79 runs.

YCFTN and Bukkake return for a 2nd effort with a fine start to the 13th over. A cracking zak from YCFTN sort of set the tone for the partnership. Bukkake’s rampant bat swinging continued from where he left off, including belting the ball into YCFTN’s leg (and bruise to prove it) together with excellent stroke work.*

*Stroke work did not include his member.

After our allotted 16 overs, we have a total of 110 runs. Surely, with only 5 players, we could defend it from here????

YCFTN decides that we’ll rotate the fielding positions in a clockwise manner with Pabs to lead us off with the new ball. Great bowling sees a couple catches in the 1st over, but as we soon discover, with no keeper, the Stiffy’s begin to steal a few runs and the scoreboard begins to climb. Sticka’s efforts in the 2nd over produces a wicket, but it’s not enough to contain our opposition. Overs 3 and 4 from Herschelle and YCFTN respectively reign them back in somewhat and they have 28 runs after 4overs and we secure the skin. Not that it means much, as with only 5 players, our umpire dutifully informs us that we have forfeited the match, but we’re still happy to play on.

Their next pair come out and Bukkake leads us off with a few of his trademark pie deliveries which are delt with accordingly. Then, under the rotation policy, it’s back to Kleenex, Sticks and Herschelle for overs 6, 7 and 8. A couple more wickets are produced under pressure but it’s not enough as the Stiffy’s clean us up with a partnership of 56 runs. Speaking of cleaning us up, during Stick’s over, he’s put one down leg side which was smacked into the deathseat where YCFTN just happened to be, not that he saw the ball, but at least the deathseat lived up to it’s name!

From here on in, Da Famulee did it’s best to contain the runs but with several zaks hit off the bowling of Bukkake and YCFTN, a few more cha-chings for the kitty for dropped catches and missed run-out opportunities, mediocrity was the winner on the night! The Stiffy’s bat out their 16 overs and finish with 155 runs, 45 more than the Famulee.
A top effort by those who played and surely as new benchmark for 5 players in a side.

FORREST

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